Modern Day Warrior
Letter to you, from me, describing what this whole Modern Day Warrior thing is really about. No frills, no bullshit, just my story: Pain, Problem, Possibility, Path, and Paradise. See if it resonates with you.
Over a decade ago, things started out really great for Jennie and I (she’s my wife), there was a lot of passion, humor, connection, desire. All that and more. There was a depth I hadn’t experienced before in intimacy.
And… then after a year… it was gone.
We weren’t sure what was happening at first, and people we talked to said it was normal and that it was just going to be that way (thanks Mom and Dad…).
So we tried to power through it, but it just wasn’t working. We had achieved a depth, got a taste of something potent and profound, and now it was gone. I became very painful.
And… it cascaded, into everything else in our lives, including our bodies, our spirituality, our communication and parenting, and our business.
It’s not the same for everyone, but for us, the pain just grew and grew until we started to seriously question the whole marriage. We had forged a bond through on early sexual intimacy, and that intimacy was gone, and we just didn’t know what to do.
And something else. This wasn’t my first marriage. My first marriage was trapped by the pain of addiction and my first wife ended up accidentally overdosing on pain pills. Somehow I survived that tragedy, through the power of my determination and the loving and powerful support of my family and tribe around me.
So… you see… when I found Jennie it was a rebirth of HOPE. I didn’t realize I could love again like I did when I met her. She reignited my passion to not only live, but to THRIVE. So… when my connection to her started to fade, I was faced with the sickening realization that my second marriage my die as well.
I didn’t frame it like this back then, but the options were thus:
Quit the Marriage – I could hope to find someone else, someone I could get that connection with again. Of course, there were complications to that plan: our kids, the stigma of failure, the messiness of breaking up, and layers of other fears. I didn’t like where we were at, I had no idea what was really wrong, but I realized that quitting the marriage was going to be a big thing, painful, and it might not even work to help me find someone else. Or I could just get divorced and crawl into a hole away from everyone, becoming a hermit (believe me, this option was on the table!). Which led to the next option:
Gut it Out – This was what we had been doing, and even though it wasn’t working very well, I figured I could double down on it. (Later I would realize this led to sedation, lies, and escapes to deal with it, some that even considered the worst possible scenario: Cheating.) So at that time, I considered Gutting it Out the ‘noble’ path and the one my parents taught me by their example. It was also less fearful than ending it, which almost certainly would land me in a blame, shame game with high financial costs and damage to my relationships with my kids, and probably my community and church. So without really understanding these frames, we were choosing Gut it Out, with a dash of hope it might just get better by itself.
Well, there turned out to be a third option. And that’s what I want to talk about with you here on this page.
Change It - One day, after a particularly harrowing experience of disconnection with Jennie that I recount on my podcast, I had a life changing epiphany: WE NEED TO CHANGE THIS. At this point, I have got no idea what’s wrong. Nothing. I just have this thought, this feeling, this determination: WE NEED TO CHANGE THIS.
And that is usually where I meet people like you reading this. Most people find me in synchronicity when they make some internal decision to change their relationship dynamic, and even their entire life.
That’s the point in my experience where it starts.
So I went to Jennie, told her we needed to fix this, period. One of my mentors calls this DRAWING THE LINE IN THE SAND. I’m not sure what it was other than a change INSIDE me that said: We need to change this.
And she responded and said, yep, you are right.
Now remember, at this point we didn’t have a clue what was wrong. We didn’t know what the problem was. We just knew we were in pain, and so we stopped hiding from that, and acknowledged the pain, and made a choice to try and change.
You might think we should have done this a long time ago, but in my experience most people, myself included, end up in the Gut it Out path by way of just atrophy. It just creeps up on you, life, kids, work, health, and suddenly the connection is gone.
That’s how it happened to us.
So… at some point you have to face that and make a choice to stop ‘gutting it out’ or stop ‘contemplating divorce’ and just make a move.
For us, as the primary tension was lack of passion and intimacy, I started reading a TON of books on intimacy and passion. I even bought books on Tantric and Taoist sex! I tried a lot of stuff. I heard about a 2 day relationship class in SLC, and we took that.
The result was that we started to really see the possibilities. We weren’t wrong in thinking or feeling that something more was possible! The Gut it Out, this is normal, get used to it, way of doing a marriage was not for us. We were right. There was way more possible.
But… the books didn’t really help us get there. They just kind of expanded the possibilities, which actually just expanded the PAIN!
And then one day we got some advice from a dear friend of ours, Suzanne Wagner. She told us to go to a David Deida workshop.
I looked at some of his books, and was immediately drawn to The Way of the Superior Man. (I highly recommend it to everyone who resonates with the above problems.)
We felt there was ‘something’ here with his work that could help us, and so, in a bold move, costing us $7,000.00 ($6,000 for the event and $1,000.00 for travel, hotel, car rental and food) we interviewed and were accepted and signed up for a 3 day small group intensive with David Deida on a private piece of land in Ojai California.
It turned out to be the best money we ever spent.
We met in a small studio (a converted garage) with 22 other people, men, women, and couples. We sat in a semi circle on back jacks on the ground. It felt very foreign and itchy to me. The people I had met when coming in seemed very much like hippies to me, and I was a conservative Midwest Utah guy (don’t worry, I’ve expanded a lot since then!). They didn’t have coffee, they had tea, and no sugar, only stevia. And they talked a lot about YOGA.
I’m not sure if that paints the picture for you, but to me it was foreign and I felt like an outsider.
When David came in and sit in front of us, I was nervous as hell, and wondered if I hadn’t made a mistake coming here. He asked if anyone wanted to volunteer why we had come. My hand shot up, and he pointed to me and I told him that I was convinced we needed therapy and that our relationship was on the ropes, and we really needed help.
He said, something like this: “Your relationship doesn’t need therapy, you have a different problem. The problem is you are the wife. We’ll fix it by the end of the weekend.”
And he turned to someone else.
I was flabbergasted and supremely PISSED.
But you probably know how the story ended. By the end of the weekend, our problems HAD been fixed, and we started a totally new journey in our lives that ultimately leads me right here, right now, talking to you about my life.
So, yes, David insulted me by calling me the wife, but what was he really talking about? Well he was identifying the problem that Jennie and I had in our relationship:
We had lost polarity.
That was the problem.
And David was challenging me to RISE in my Masculine.
Now I didn’t even know what that meant, but it was explained and more importantly shown to me that I was ‘dull in my masculine” and Jennie had suppressed her feminine side. And because of that, we had become neutralize and lost the spark of attraction between us.
So what was the PATH?
The first path was to stop sedating and Gutting it Out and starting earnestly searching for a way to fix this. This universe heard us and answered our prayers and the path led us to David Deida and then continued to many others.
He taught us the distinction between Masculine and Feminine energies, and how to embody them at will to create polarity, attraction, passion and all the good stuff we had when we first met, and WAY MORE. We also learned to embody our Masculine and Feminine energies in every day life, business, body, and balance. It made all the difference in the world.
Finally, David Deida introduced us to a concept that I hinted at above, but now began to explore in greater personal depth: The Spiritual Side of Intimacy. I had intuited that there was something deep, potent, and profound about our intimate connection, but now I was shown that this was no mistake, that there was indeed deep life altering power and purpose possible in our connection.
And so we were all in. It had immediately drastic positive effects back home with each other, with our bodies, with our work, and with our family. It ultimately gave us individual power, that we could use to gift each other and the world with, oriented towards depth and purpose.
It became a totally new way of life. It wasn’t like changing a tire on a car. It was like changing the entire car, and the upgrade was astounding.
In many ways, it’s hard to believe until you come and see for yourself. I’m not here to convince you it’s real, but I’m telling you it is, and inviting you to ultimately come see for yourself.
There are always two goals. The obvious first goal, say to improve your sex life, and then the deeper goal, the one you didn’t realize you even had: To become the deepest most powerful profound version of your self possible.
That’s what this work does for you.
So what happened next? I realized that there was an art and skill of the masculine and I couldn’t help myself: I began to work at learning and embodying it in every way I could. If I had an opportunity to work with men, on the masculine, then I did it. This is what I’ve done over the last decade. Meanwhile, my wife got turned on by the power of her authentic feminine, and dived into a decade’s worth of work in that realm.
Somewhere in all this study, work, travel, and dedication… we started to realize something: We were being called to train others in the polarity of the Masculine and Feminine. This has been a lot of work, and it’s led us through many painful paths to become the people who could offer this kind of work to you.
But it turns out, we’ve gotten VERY GOOD at it.
Our specialty is helping people in relationship who have similar issues as you saw above:
You are in pain with a lack of connection in your relationship or to yourself. Sedation and lies have been the way you’ve Gutted it Out till now.
You are ready and choose to change it: You’ve indicated to the universe that you want something different.
You are open to very different experience and approach to masculine and feminine, and you are willing to engage in a spiritual approach to that polarity.
That’s it. You are here now reading this, so the only question for you is this: Are you ready to take the next step?
And let me take the pressure off you. There is no wrong answer here. If you aren’t ready, or you don’t feel this work is what you want, or that it’s even useful, no worries. When I found out how to drastically change my life… it just happened. It was right, and I didn’t need to be pressured into anything. Now… I was SCARED, and wanted to quit because I was scared, but that’s not the same as not being ready.
SO WHAT IS THE MODERN DAY WARRIOR?
The Modern Day Warrior is a 3 day event, an experiential process unlike any you’ve experienced before (not exaggerating), that helps men see, feel, and embody their masculine at profound new levels. We use all sorts of practices that I’ve learned over the last decade from hundreds of different sources, many of them ancient Taoist and Tantric teachings, while others are some of the most modern cutting edge neuroscience inspired methods.
It’s just something you feel, and you jump into, or you don’t.
A FEW DETAILS
It costs $600.00.
It runs all day Friday, Saturday and Sunday, October 25, 26, 27, 2019.
It’s held in Heber City Utah, on a private ranch. You’ll have to fly in to SLC and drive to Heber and find a hotel. Lodging is not included.
Meals are included.
It’s physical, it’s emotional, it’s spiritual, it’s demanding, it’s challenging, and it’s fun.
Any questions? Write me: Jason@jasonfsmith.com or find me on FACEBOOK.
Modern Day Warrior Weekend is an intense 3 day experiential experience for men who demand more of themselves as they master the challenges of Women, Business, and Sexual Desire. Across all five core areas of your life, Body, Being, Balance, Business and Bedroom.
Modern Day Warrior Weekend is a transformational event specifically designed as a pattern interrupt in your life, to resurrect your masculine power as a Warrior today seeking freedom to be who you really are amidst a toxic and weak culture that suppresses you at best, and oppresses you at worst.
Learn more about Modern Day Warrior Weekend Creator Jason F. Smith in this interview with Garrett J. White, founder of Wake Up Warrior.
It’s a place you can’t hide.
The Modern Day Warrior Weekend is an Embodied Spiritual Path....
Decisive Decision Making
"You perceive that something is missing in your life. It worries you that you cannot name it or define it precisely. That's not an excuse for not starting, that's the POINT of starting." - Eric Greitens - Navy Seal.
I created the Modern Day Warrior 3-day Intensive because I had to. When I started working with couples at Shades of Intimacy, it became quickly apparent that the men needed MORE. A separate workshop designed just for men, to dive into the specific challenges that face men today.
The same technology that I discovered and developed to create change in relationships turned out to work even better when refined just for men. There is nothing so potent and profound in the world than a tribe of trustable men, who know who they are, know where they are, and know exactly where they are going.
Out of such simplicity comes earth shaking change, not only for yourself, but for your family and for the world.
Brother, I don't care if you are sixty years old and finding yourself for the first time after a life of lies and mistakes... or if you are twenty years old and still feeling immortal. Either way, a brother is a brother, and if you are hungry to do more with your life, to go further, to discover what you really are born to do here on this planet... then you have found your new tribe.
Modern Day Warrior is a workshop for men that will help you discover and refine your deepest purpose in the world among a tribe of trustable, powerful, and compassionate brothers. Using ancient and modern technologies that explore and highlight the differences between Masculine and Feminine archetypes, oriented toward DEPTH, you will learn how to use the agility of polarity to increase your passion, power, and presence through your purpose in the world.
Men come to Modern Day Warrior Workshops because they want something more out of life.
If you do, you are not alone.
Clear Vision (You will learn to see and divine more clearly what you need for yourself, your family, your woman, and the world - This clarity is invaluable)
Increased Power (to get the things you want done in your life)
Increased Trust (from others and yourself)
Better Sex - (and by better I mean infinitely better... revolutionary changes in your sex life and in the sex life of your partner).
Deeper Relationships (with everyone... yourself included).
Co-creative Magic with the Universe (you will experience an ease of functioning... the universe works with you instead of against you... )
Relaxation (Stop projecting anything onto anyone or yourself... simply relax as you are and feel a deep content joy in life as well as a motor of energy to explore and adventure with!)
Find Your Purpose (find what you are meant to do most deeply on this earth... and do it. Simple as that.)
By reading through this website you will have a sense of whether this is for you. If you still don't know, drop me a line and we'll get on the phone for a powerful conversation.
YES. Tuition is $600.00 a person, but no one is left out in the cold if they want to come and have exhausted all other means. We are brothers. Buy Ticket HERE.
It’s a peak experience, a pattern interrupt, that will reawaken you to your core Masculine KING. It’s an experiential experience that really can’t be fully described, because words don’t do it justice. Talk to someone who has been, watch the videos, reach out to me. Your heart will tell you whether this is for you. It’s a challenging peak experience pattern interrupt designed shift you dramatically in yoru life toward what you really want, LONG TERM.
Yes. There is a 90 Day King’s Challenge offered after as well as private one on one consultations.
Yes. Contact us at Jason@jasonfsmith.com for appropriate options.
No. It's a journey and you need to be there from start to finish. All day Friday to Sunday. It's not just about you getting all the information. We will go very deep as a group, and it really will hinder the progress as a whole if one man is coming and going.
If you are having problems paying the tuition all up front drop me a line or give me a call.
Absolutely. Each Workshop is different. As I mention above, they are co-creative events tailored to the needs of the men who come. Many men return again and again to the Modern Day Warrior Workshop and get totally different things to help them each time, or simply to refresh themselves in the fire of masculine company. Growth is a process I’ve noted, so I think it’s a good idea to return to the crucible when you feel you need another calling to depth.
Food is included. Housing is NOT.
This experience will revolutionize your life... if you put them into practice. It takes a lot of hard work, commitment and a sense of humor. But if you persist, the life you are living now will seem as but a shadow compared to what you become.
Passage—immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins!
Away, O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
Cut the hawsers—haul out—shake out every sail!
Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
Have we not grovell’d here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
Have we not darken’d and dazed ourselves with books long enough?
Sail forth! steer for the deep waters only!
Reckless, O soul, exploring, I with thee, and thou with me;
For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.
O my brave soul!
O farther, farther sail!
O daring joy, but safe! Are they not all the seas of God?
O farther, farther, farther sail!